Memories of Kel

Memories of Kel http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/ Welcome to my memories... Each page contains words and pictures of my past years... Move through them slowly =D Sat, 17 May 2008 14:47:49 -0000 Sat, 17 May 2008 10:14:00 -0000 Memories of Kel http://images.kelvinklw.multiply.com/logo http://kelvinklw.multiply.com 100 100 17 May 2008, Anger-filled Involved in certain operation once again, that I haven't been sleeping for the past 3 nights because I was on duty. Was supposed to go to sleep in the day, but I was moved into a room filled with inconsiderate people who will switch on the lights, play their PSP with the volume on max, and talk to one another as if all of them are at different corners of the earth. Didn't manage to catch enough sleep that I doze off during duty, just feel so exhausted. Sometimes I think I have better keep my mouth sealed. No one takes my points seriously, or even give a thought about it. I was told to keep quiet because I was trying to explain what happened, I was told that I was wrong when I was trying to explain my point of view on certain things, then what is the point of asking me and calling me a discussion? I may not be a specialist or hold a certain rank, I may not be more knowledgeable or gifted in certain things, but does that make my view or answers less-valued or less important? I'm exha... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/230/17_May_2008_Anger-filled Sat, 17 May 2008 10:14:00 -0000 12 May 2008 A lot of thoughts has been coming to mind lately after touching down in Singapore from overseas exercise. Mostly negative, very little positive thoughts. Circumstances at home and around me aren't helping either, just adding on to the load of sadness that I'm suffering from. Can't really share my thoughts online, since it is opened to the whole world to read. But there was one thought, what should be the motivation to push me into training harder to pass my SOC and IPPT, that I don't have to stay back on Friday evening in camp and book out on Saturday morning instead? I don't have a girlfriend to commit my Friday evenings and Saturday mornings to, there were many times I would find staying in camp much better than being at home, I'm not serving in any ministry that requires my Saturday morning. I mean, there is just no reason to push myself at all. I thought things are getting better around me, but it just isn't so... If there is one less of me in this world, it won't be any difference.... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/229/12_May_2008 Sun, 11 May 2008 17:16:00 -0000 9 May 2008, Cheated When I was picking up my bag to book in at Nee Soon camp last night, I realised that I left my head-dress at Jurong camp before I left for overseas exercise! I thought that I will be returning back to Jurong after arriving back in Singapore, but never expected that I would need my head-dress for a parade at who-knows-where, so I just left it under my bed to 'season' it. Rushed back to Jurong, grabbed a few stuffs plus some medicine for my feet and hand, rushed out to take a cab to Nee Soon. The activity for today that requires me to book in last night: Watch a parade and eat KFC, then book out... I feel so cheated! I booked out at 1100hrs this morning! Which means I was just called back to unit to sleep overnight so that I may watch a parade in the next morning, have some KFC and off I go! I could have slept on my own bed... Ok, at least I'm home now, and I'm able to go out later, so I shall not complain too much about it. Plus, returning back to unit has made me realised that I have a pl... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/228/9_May_2008_Cheated_ Fri, 9 May 2008 05:11:00 -0000 8 May 2008, Those type of... ... days again, when I have planned for what to do during these 'off' days, I receive a piece of bad news that just have to ruin it all... Sergeant: "Hi Kelvin, you have to book in tonight at Nee Soon camp as there is a formation parade tomorrow. I know you have to book in on Sunday instead, but OC has overwrite the instruction as we are turning ops again next Tuesday." Can't believe it. I just came back from an overseas exercise! Where is my well-deserved 'off'? If I'm turning operational again next Tuesday, that means I will have at least two weeks that will be burned soon. Was thinking of going out to town after bringing my nephew to catch the school bus, but this phone-call just got to arrive at the moment I open the door of my house. Totally no mood anymore... Sigh http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/227/8_May_2008_Those_type_of... Thu, 8 May 2008 04:44:00 -0000 7 May 2008, Emptiness It just feels good to be sleeping on my own bed after being away for 18 days... The emptiness that is filled within, no matter what was done, just can't seem to be changed... Picking up my guitar is like picking up a piece of wood. The keyboard felt like some plastics on my fingers as I type this entry away. The songs playing on my computer just doesn't feel right. Even my presence in this world just feels weird. Maybe I'm tired... Or maybe I'm missing out on something... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/226/7_May_2008_Emptiness Wed, 7 May 2008 03:08:00 -0000 3 May 2008, Good Morning! One of the routine I formed in this camp: waking up early at 5 plus in the morning to use one of the computer terminals available. Usually by 6 plus, the computers would be fully booked and it would take many hours before one would be available for use since people would keep putting coins into the machine to keep their games going. Maybe I should do that too huh? =P On the day of departure, I bought 2 books at 2 different bookstores thinking that I might need some reading materials while training here. However, I was proved wrong! 2 isn't enough! I never bring my PSP, no games to play nor movies to watch, finished reading those books, I was left to rot since yesterday! Hahaha... My first time spending more than 12 hours a day sleeping because there isn't anything to do at all. Just like what my friend would say, we complain when there is training, we complain more when we have nothing to do for the whole day! Haha =D 2 more days and I will be going for my R&R! Can't wait to go and... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/225/3_May_2008_Good_Morning Fri, 2 May 2008 22:07:00 -0000 2 May 2008 I'm back in camp from the outfield! Managed to kill any living creature that was standing near me since I didn't get to shower for the past 10 days out in the field... Hahaha =P Just kidding la huh, the killing was a joke, but the 10 days of not showering is real... And the water turned black as I shower! 0_0 Shall type more when I return back to Singapore! Limited time online! Spent $1.50 SGD for online liao. Haha =P Getting home on 7th May! =D http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/224/2_May_2008 Thu, 1 May 2008 22:49:00 -0000 19 April 2008, At T Upon arriving at my current camp, I was rather surprised to find the condition of the camp here. Somehow I find my camp back in Singapore is much better. Since I will only be here for 3 weeks, I guess I can still live through it =) Yup! I'm online! There are actually computer facilities in the camp for use, 50 cents SGD for 20 minutes, not a bad deal anyway. The weather here is a little much cooler than expected, forgotten to bring my jacket this trip, froze while travelling on the plane and touring the neighbouring towns yesterday. When the cold wind blows, that is when my hair stand. I have to say, the towns here are almost like a ghost town without us around. I really wonder how do the businesses actually survive without tourist. The mountains and the surroundings are very beautiful too! Forgotten to pack my camera into my luggage as I was in a rush on Thursday, bought one instant camera yesterday instead but haven't managed to get any shot yet. Shall try to get some really nice ph... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/223/19_April_2008_At_T Fri, 18 Apr 2008 23:57:00 -0000 17 April 2008, Off to T! Going off in about an hour to meet a friend before going to the airport. Would not be coming online for the next 3 weeks unless I managed to get hold of a computer =) Please pray for me, for safety during the training. People might think that our armed forces train in a safe environment, it is true, but there will definitely be risk involved especially during rainy days when I have to handle signal sets. And of course for my family, to be rest assured that I am in the safe hands of my God =) See everybody soon! http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/222/17_April_2008_Off_to_T Thu, 17 Apr 2008 11:09:00 -0000 Still Calls Me Son - John Waller I drug his name through godless places And I’ve known shame that no child of his should know I’ve seen pain on broken faces Beyond all thought of hope I was just too far from home Still I always wondered when I closed my eyes After all I’ve done Could he run to me? Would he kiss my face? Could he even look at me? After where I’ve been should he take me back? I would understand I’ve disgraced him But it would be amazing If he still calls me son With nothing left for me to bring him I left my pride and turned my heart toward home I saw my home on the horizon And from a distance I saw my Father Watching for his own with forgiving eyes After all I’d done He just ran to me Then he kissed my face He would not let go of me After where I’d been He just welcomed me I didn’t understand But he put his robe on me It was so amazing That he still called me son One day as I breathe my last And I know my days on earth have ended When every hour is spent I wil... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/video/item/5/Still_Calls_Me_Son_-_John_Waller Thu, 17 Apr 2008 02:47:24 -0000 Still Calls Me Son, by John Waller *Click on "Play this Playlist" at the bottom of the page* I drug his name through godless places And I’ve known shame that no child of his should know I’ve seen pain on broken faces Beyond all thought of hope I was just too far from home Still I always wondered when I closed my eyes After all I’ve done Could he run to me? Would he kiss my face? Could he even look at me? After where I’ve been should he take me back? I would understand I’ve disgraced him But it would be amazing If he still calls me son With nothing left for me to bring him I left my pride and turned my heart toward home I saw my home on the horizon And from a distance I saw my Father Watching for his own with forgiving eyes After all I’d done He just ran to me Then he kissed my face He would not let go of me After where I’d been He just welcomed me I didn’t understand But he put his robe on me It was so amazing That he still called me son One day as I breathe my last And I... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/music/item/94/Still_Calls_Me_Son_by_John_Waller Thu, 17 Apr 2008 02:36:21 -0000 16 April 2008, a Big Thanksgiving It has been almost 4 months since we last spoken a word to one another. We have finally broke the silence, although it was a little awkward initially when I asked if she still wanted dinner. My sister was in the kitchen when I was grabbing my food and there were still some kind of tension because I didn't know if I should speak to her, but God gave me the strength to do it, to ask just a simple question that ended the cold war. I'm thankful to God, because that has been my prayer for the past months, that our relationship may be restored. God has given me opportunities, and finally I grabbed it. He had been putting this matter into my heart since that Saturday, at that moment I was buying the donuts. When she responded to my question, tears were just starting to form in my eyes. It was a kind of joy that I couldn't explain. At that moment, I knew what forgiveness really meant. My sister even offered me the soup that she cooked. It was awkward, but it was worth it... I'm thankful, tha... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/221/16_April_2008_a_Big_Thanksgiving Wed, 16 Apr 2008 14:56:00 -0000 16 April 2008, I Would Like To Invent... ...a machine that would be able to capture my memories and print them out into photographs. Of course I must be able to choose which memories I would like to print, since there are also certain past which shouldn't be mentioned anymore. I was lying on my bed on Monday night thinking about the buddies that I have made during BMT days. Just being with my current bunk mates remind me of those buddies because both groups of friends are just as crazy and fun-loving. There were many funny moments that I had at P.Tekong where cameras cannot be brought in to put them into pictures, otherwise I would be flipping through the photos and laughing at them. The way we pushed our cupboards and beds out of the room to do area-cleaning, marching to the cookhouse singing the same old songs, lying down on the floor instead of on the bed after breakfast to avoid being caught by sergeants for sleeping when it was time for area-cleaning, all the silly moments when we sat down together to polish our pair of... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/220/16_April_2008_I_Would_Like_To_Invent... Wed, 16 Apr 2008 13:02:00 -0000 14 April 2008, Just One More Day Spent the whole morning reading the book entitled - For One More Day. It is the first book that I can actually finished reading within half the day, since I am a very slow reader, always taking a long time to finish a book even though it can be rather thin. The book put me to much thoughts, have I been a good son? The character in the story has made a list of "The times when mum stood up for me" and another list "The times when I did NOT stand up for mum" or something like that. As I reflect and think, indeed there were many times my mum had been my defender during difficult and tough times, but I was the one who brought hurts to her when that was what she didn't need at all. I remember an occasion a year or two ago, my guitar dropped onto the ground while I was still asleep, then I found a chip on the head when I woke up. I remember that in that particular morning, she had come into my room to draw the curtain for me, but I have not remembered if she was the actual cause of what h... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/219/14_April_2008_Just_One_More_Day Mon, 14 Apr 2008 10:55:00 -0000 For One More Day Tired of living for the second of your life? Too ashamed by everything that life become meaingless? Just then, while the man was trying to commit suicide, he met the biggest lover of his life who has passed away eight years ago, his mum. A very interesting story written about a man who saw his mother's ghost after he met an accident. Just for that one day of interaction with his mum, he came to reflect on his life when she was still alive, how he has treated her, whether he has been a good son, a good father to his daughter. Very easy to read, yet very emotional, especially if you try to place yourself in the author's shoes. Treat your mum well! And of course your dad too...! Do not live till the last moment and regret, wishing for just one more day to spend more time with http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/reviews/item/5 Mon, 14 Apr 2008 10:51:12 -0000 13 April 2008, 10th Month While typing the date of my title, I have come to realise that it would be the 10th month that I have served the nation tomorrow, since I was enlisted on 14th June 2007. It has also showed how faithful God has been to me for the past months, through the ups and downs, bringing me through things that I have never imagined that I would actually survived till this day. There are still many uncertain things ahead which I can only pray for Him to reveal and guide me through, until the day I am released from the service, until the day I graduated from university, until the day I stand and say my wedding vow, until the day I become a father, until the day I see my children married, until the day I return to His side in heaven. Parents came forward to dedicate their babies to the Lord during service. It was a wonderful sight to see so many children in service, since most of them would be at the 3rd level instead during services weekly, and the parents coming forward to present their childr... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/218/13_April_2008_10th_Month Sun, 13 Apr 2008 09:47:00 -0000 Slow Fade, by Casting Crowns A song that kept repeating in my player while booking into camp last Sunday. Very true, everything has its own slow fading consequence. *Click on "Play This Playlist" to listen* Be careful little eyes what you see It’s the second glance that ties your hands As darkness pulls the strings. Be careful little feet where you go For it’s the little feet behind you that are sure to follow It’s a slow fade when you give yourself away It’s a slow fade when black and white are turned to gray And thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid When you give yourself away People never crumble in a day It’s a slow fade, it’s a slow fade Be careful little ears what you hear When flattering leads to compromises, the end is always near Be careful little lips what you say For empty words and promises lead broken hearts astray It’s a slow fade when you give yourself away It’s a slow fade when black and white are turned to gray And thoughts invade, choices are made, ... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/music/item/92/Slow_Fade_by_Casting_Crowns Sun, 13 Apr 2008 02:34:19 -0000 12 April 2008, Emo Week My company has finally returned from their training at another camp, days of sleeping alone in the bunk are gone. Waking up in the morning, queueing up for my turn to brush my teeth, is something that I'm trying to get used to as I didn't have to queue for my turn while I was stationed at HQ and while these friends are away. The silence of the bunk has finally been broken, noise and fun has returned, something which I appreciate. The peace and quietness of the bunk is gone for now, reading the Bible and reflecting on the day may not be done in 'peace' anymore, but man are created to not live alone <img style="font-family: trebuchet ms;" src="http://images.multiply.com/common/smiles/smile.png"> It had been a week filled with emotions for me, with something that I regretted doing when I was away at the library on Thursday night on my 'night-off'. I shall not reveal it here, since anyone can be reading this entry. It had also been a week filled with thoughts and memories of the past which I have written down into my journal since there isn't anyone whom I can share it with. I have ne... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/217/12_April_2008_Emo_Week Sat, 12 Apr 2008 14:20:00 -0000 Christ the Lord - Out of Egypt A novel written that focus on Jesus when He was young. I emphasise that it is a frictional novel, written with the imagination of Anne Rice on how Jesus might have lived as a kid between the age of 7 to 12. This isn't like Da Vinci Code, but it is a novel written in the point of view of a Catholic =) Born as a child, not knowing about His power or the story when He was born, Jesus was like a normal child living among the children in His family and the village that He was living in. Just like any child, He dreamt of nightmare, got hurt in a fight, admire the beauty of our Father's creations. However, He had the power that no other child had, of bringing a child back to life and able to heal the blind man. A child of His age at that time, He has the ability to think and talk like others who are older. He questioned about His birth, why His family members had told Him to be 'careful' with what He prays for, why Joseph and Mary had kept silence about His birth history until He came of a... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/reviews/item/4 Sat, 12 Apr 2008 14:06:11 -0000 Donut Factory Coupon! Valid till 30 April 2008! If you would like to munch any donut, print this out and make your purchase =) *Disclaimer: I'm not working for this company nor am I having any relational ties with them, so don't come running after me if you are unsatisfied with the products purchased with your hard-earn money http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/photos/album/71/Donut_Factory_Coupon Sat, 12 Apr 2008 05:16:40 -0000 6 April 2008, My Child Some comments which I heard today... "Hey, your nephew looks like you leh! It's like he is your son!" - Anonymous "The father and son! Now our CG has expanded to have children too! Don't worry Kel, Jesus loves children... Hahaha" - Howie "Bringing your son to church? =D" - Andy's lady friend, of whom I just can't remember her name After going to church today, I realised that I have become a father all of a sudden, not knowing who the mother of the child is, or who did I bore the son with! From uncle, I have become a father. Haha... Thankful for the each of the CG mates who have came forward to chat with my nephew and allow him to feel like he is in this group too, plus babysitting him while I was away shopping for some items that I will need for my training on the small island. Sometimes I really wonder why that kid can really bring lots of anger but also laughter at the same time. Because of this monkey, and also the other two monkeys at home (Yup, 3 monkeys altogether), I have come to ... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/216/6_April_2008_My_Child Sun, 6 Apr 2008 11:10:00 -0000 04 April 2008, Dinner (& Desert) with a Sister Look at the cakes! =P At one of the restaurants in Raffles http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/photos/album/70/04_April_2008_Dinner_Desert_with_a_Sister Sun, 6 Apr 2008 01:58:57 -0000 5 April 2008, Movin' On Jon was leading worship this evening at WEB service and I joined in to be a backup vocalist. A few weeks back, Mark Lim has told me to pray for God to show me where would He wants me to serve in the church ministry, of which I have always thought of going to the worship ministry to serve again like before. I prayed, thinking that God may have opened a door for me to serve there once again, but He showed me otherwise. What I enjoyed doing most isn't leading people into worshipping God through songs anymore although I still love to sing unto Him. What I enjoy most now is the interaction between fellow brothers and sisters or the younger ones, getting to know one another better and praying for them. That drew me closer to God as well, through the fellowship and encouragements exchanged through each others sharing. To me, worship isn't just about singing anymore, it is about doing what I love to do and giving my best to Him that whatever the result may be, I may say that He has given me ... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/215/5_April_2008_Movin_On Sat, 5 Apr 2008 16:01:00 -0000 4 April 2008, Thankful Dinner Met up with a fellow sister for dinner at Chinatown after she knocked off from work this evening. It had been more than a year since we last met up, only keeping in contact with each other through SMS or MSN. She sounds very cheerful most of the time when we talk on the phone once every blue moon, or even just now when we met up (even though life is not problem-free). A very contagious thing I guess. Very thankful for this sister. We knew each other in a very weird way too. Through MIRC (yes, aka IRC, the old way of communicating online. You will know it if you are old enough like me! Wahahaha), we chat and got to know each other a little, then became friends ever since when she was at the end of secondary 1 while I was secondary 3 then. Thankful to God for how He has given an opportunity to have known a friend like her. =) Bought a lot of chocolate while I was out this afternoon. Was very tempted to open one and pop into my mouth just now, then realised I need to reserve my throat for... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/214/4_April_2008_Thankful_Dinner Sat, 5 Apr 2008 04:30:00 -0000 East to West, by Casting Crowns Since whatever song that we upload unto Multiply isn't available for download or listening anymore, I have decided to share songs through Youtube. Strongly encouraged to read the lyric of this song, understand it, don't just let it be another music played into your ears =) East to West, by Casting Crowns Album: The Altar and the Door Here I am Lord and I’m drowning In Your sea of forgetfulness The chains of yesterday surround me I yearn for peace and rest I don’t want to end up where You found me And it echoes in my mind Keeps me awake tonight I know You’ve cast my sin as far As the East is from the West And I stand before You now As though I’ve never sinned But today I feel like I’m just one mistake away From You leaving me this way Jesus, can You show me just how far the East is from the West? Cause I can’t bear to see the man I’ve been Rising up in me again In the arms of Your mercy I find rest You know just how far the East is from the West From one... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/video/item/4/East_to_West_by_Casting_Crowns Fri, 4 Apr 2008 16:55:56 -0000 3 April 2008, Dinner & a Broken Heart Just like Jon's nick, "Lousy Dinner, Great Conversation", had a good time of meeting up with him over dinner at BK. The food was not up to our expectations, his fries having some green stuff on it, while my onion rings looking very healthy as the colour is very pale. However, a fruitful dinner where we spent time sharing about certain stuffs and gossiping about certain people (wahahaha...). I was just kidding. We don't gossip. =P A few takeaways from our conversations was to pray for certain growth in our CG. He asked when was the most memorable CG/WG meeting I ever had, and all I could think of wasn't so much about the outings that we always have, but instead is that one particular meeting which my COPYCATS WG gathered at Galvin and Dorothy's house. We gathered not knowing what to do except to have a "as-usual" type of meeting, plus Tze wasn't around that night and we didn't know what to do as we didn't plan anything. I picked up the guitar and led a few songs, but those few songs d... http://kelvinklw.multiply.com/journal/item/213/3_April_2008_Dinner_a_Broken_Heart Thu, 3 Apr 2008 15:05:00 -0000